Sep 13, 2012
Sep 5, 2012
Jesus did not say....
Jesus said give all you have to the poor.
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor only if they would be willing to work.
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor if they deserve it.
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor if they are Caucasian.
Jesus said to love your neighbor.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who thinks like you do.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who treats you right.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who loves you back.
Jesus said to seek justice.
Jesus did not say to only seek justice for issues that will benefit you.
Jesus did not say to seek justice for those who deserve it.
Jesus did not say to seek partial justice.
Jesus said to care for the widows and orphans.
Jesus did not say to care for the widows and orphans in your own country first.
Jesus did not say he cared how they got in their situation.
Jesus did not say to isolate single/young moms into a stigma impossible to escape.
Jesus expects us, as Christians, to be him on earth. And that is a lot more radical than signing a check, attending a church, or having a bumper sticker. Today with my youth we talked about being the body of Christ. They started to see that God has placed them where they are with a purpose, and they are all needed. every. last. one. Jesus did not say that only the people who deserve health care, are the people who work for it. Jesus did not say that the only people to deserve to eat, are the people willing to work. Jesus did not tell us that our focus needed to be on politics, social programs, or broad issues. Maybe if the church would step up and do what Jesus said we wouldn't need things like Food Stamps, WIC, or Medicare. Jesus did not say that issues about people are more important than actual people. Jesus did not say we should treat someone different because of the color of their skin, their sexual orientation, or their life choices. Jesus was not a Republican. More importantly, Jesus was not an American.
Who are we really trying to please? Who is really benefiting from what we do? Who are we really trying to be?
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor only if they would be willing to work.
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor if they deserve it.
Jesus did not say give all you have to the poor if they are Caucasian.
Jesus said to love your neighbor.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who thinks like you do.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who treats you right.
Jesus did not say to love the neighbor who loves you back.
Jesus said to seek justice.
Jesus did not say to only seek justice for issues that will benefit you.
Jesus did not say to seek justice for those who deserve it.
Jesus did not say to seek partial justice.
Jesus said to care for the widows and orphans.
Jesus did not say to care for the widows and orphans in your own country first.
Jesus did not say he cared how they got in their situation.
Jesus did not say to isolate single/young moms into a stigma impossible to escape.
Jesus expects us, as Christians, to be him on earth. And that is a lot more radical than signing a check, attending a church, or having a bumper sticker. Today with my youth we talked about being the body of Christ. They started to see that God has placed them where they are with a purpose, and they are all needed. every. last. one. Jesus did not say that only the people who deserve health care, are the people who work for it. Jesus did not say that the only people to deserve to eat, are the people willing to work. Jesus did not tell us that our focus needed to be on politics, social programs, or broad issues. Maybe if the church would step up and do what Jesus said we wouldn't need things like Food Stamps, WIC, or Medicare. Jesus did not say that issues about people are more important than actual people. Jesus did not say we should treat someone different because of the color of their skin, their sexual orientation, or their life choices. Jesus was not a Republican. More importantly, Jesus was not an American.
Who are we really trying to please? Who is really benefiting from what we do? Who are we really trying to be?
Aug 28, 2012
i'm trusting you.
God.
in this world of injustice and pain, there is so much i do not understand. when people are broken and crying out for answers, i have nothing to say. i hurt for those who are hurting. i long for answers right a long with them. somethings are not fair. they do not make sense. when families are broken. siblings are torn apart. lies are told. the truth is hard to hear. is creates bitterness. it creates anger. it creates resentment. in this world it is so easily to become lost. to find ourselves alone. i do not know what to do but, i'm trusting you.
in this world of injustice and pain, there is so much i do not understand. when people are broken and crying out for answers, i have nothing to say. i hurt for those who are hurting. i long for answers right a long with them. somethings are not fair. they do not make sense. when families are broken. siblings are torn apart. lies are told. the truth is hard to hear. is creates bitterness. it creates anger. it creates resentment. in this world it is so easily to become lost. to find ourselves alone. i do not know what to do but, i'm trusting you.
Aug 8, 2012
rain dance
I've heard the saying 'when it rains, it pours' a lot lately. I think I have come to realize that life is just one big storm and you only make it if you learn to dance in the rain.
I wish for things. My wish comes true. I wish for something else. A cycle. It is always something, and I am not talking about material things. I believe finding a sense of personal peace in this day and age is more difficult than almost anything else. I'm not even striving for happiness any more, I would settle for contentment. Settle for contentment, that sounds funny. I often wonder if I will ever live in a place where people are uplifting...encouraging. I feel like I am constantly fighting a battle for people I haven't even met. A harder battle for people I have. Why are we so mean? So judgemental? Who do we think we are? As if we are smart enough to have all the answers...to know how it is suppose to be. Who am I to say you are wrong? We are just different. The differences in us today is what the historians will write about later. Embrace the beauty of it. Let go of what cannot be changed. Myself is all I can control.
and I just want to dance.
I wish for things. My wish comes true. I wish for something else. A cycle. It is always something, and I am not talking about material things. I believe finding a sense of personal peace in this day and age is more difficult than almost anything else. I'm not even striving for happiness any more, I would settle for contentment. Settle for contentment, that sounds funny. I often wonder if I will ever live in a place where people are uplifting...encouraging. I feel like I am constantly fighting a battle for people I haven't even met. A harder battle for people I have. Why are we so mean? So judgemental? Who do we think we are? As if we are smart enough to have all the answers...to know how it is suppose to be. Who am I to say you are wrong? We are just different. The differences in us today is what the historians will write about later. Embrace the beauty of it. Let go of what cannot be changed. Myself is all I can control.
and I just want to dance.
Jun 20, 2012
Seasons Change
Though here in Mississippi it has felt like summer since April, today is the official first day of summer and the longest day of the year. As I watch the seasons change I am reminded of the ways that God changes us.
Last week I took the youth from my church to Eureka Springs, AR on a mission trip. We did some exterior painting on an artist's house. He had the most beautiful assortment of Earth toned colors, and I honestly have no idea how he knew they would look so well together. As the youth worked hard and they got to know the home owner, I could start to see some changes in them. Worship each night was focused on baggage, and letting go of the sin and things that hold us down so that we can run the race that God has set out for us. We were taught to see each person equal to the next. There was a focus on material baggage, pride, and the hurtful things people say about us and the hurtful things we say about people. Eyes were opened and each person was given an opportunity to look within themselves and realize the types of baggage they were holding on to. God provided relief to those who were weight down and comfort for those who afraid to move forward. It was a truly amazing experience, and great reminder of how blessed I am to have my job.
Last week I took the youth from my church to Eureka Springs, AR on a mission trip. We did some exterior painting on an artist's house. He had the most beautiful assortment of Earth toned colors, and I honestly have no idea how he knew they would look so well together. As the youth worked hard and they got to know the home owner, I could start to see some changes in them. Worship each night was focused on baggage, and letting go of the sin and things that hold us down so that we can run the race that God has set out for us. We were taught to see each person equal to the next. There was a focus on material baggage, pride, and the hurtful things people say about us and the hurtful things we say about people. Eyes were opened and each person was given an opportunity to look within themselves and realize the types of baggage they were holding on to. God provided relief to those who were weight down and comfort for those who afraid to move forward. It was a truly amazing experience, and great reminder of how blessed I am to have my job.
May 20, 2012
control
The only person you have any type of control over is yourself. You can not change a person. They have to choose to be different. I will not deny the power of influence, but regardless it is still a choice to change. You choose to worry. You choose to let someone/thing bother you. You choose to be angry. You choose to forgive. You choose to love. You choose to believe. You choose to pray. You choose to set a positive example. Your life is a series of choices.
I am going to choose what is right regardless of what everyone else decides to do. I can not determine what is important to someone else, but I can choose to fight for what is important to me. Again, I do not have control over anyone by myself. Why waist so much effort getting someone else to change.... to see things the way I see them? What would happen if I stopped looking at what is wrong with everyone else and started look at myself? (the only person I can actually do something about) Just because I am one person does not mean that I cannot make a difference. Just because people do not do things the way I would do them, does not make them wrong. It makes them different. This world is made up of about 7 billion different people. Welcome. Explore. Change you to make it better.
I am going to choose what is right regardless of what everyone else decides to do. I can not determine what is important to someone else, but I can choose to fight for what is important to me. Again, I do not have control over anyone by myself. Why waist so much effort getting someone else to change.... to see things the way I see them? What would happen if I stopped looking at what is wrong with everyone else and started look at myself? (the only person I can actually do something about) Just because I am one person does not mean that I cannot make a difference. Just because people do not do things the way I would do them, does not make them wrong. It makes them different. This world is made up of about 7 billion different people. Welcome. Explore. Change you to make it better.
May 7, 2012
i 'bought' into it
Somehow we have convinced ourselves that buying things for a 'good cause' is justified regardless if we need it or not. I might buy a t-shirt or get a bracelet, and who knows if the people for that 'cause' are actually ever going to see any benefit from my purchase. This is not a post to talk bad about non-profit organizations. I believe most of them are out there working for/with issues that have touched their lives. They are getting our money the only way that seems to actually work. They get us to buy things.
What if we stopped feeling the need to get something for what we give? What if we just gave without the expectation of even a thank you? As a Christian, my mindset is that what I have is not mine anyway. Why do I feel so entitled? We shouldn't have to have 'fair trade' merchandise, but instead we should trade fairly. Non-profit organizations shouldn't have to sell shoes, t-shirts, or whatever else to meet the needs of people around the world. I should see that need and be compelled to meet it myself.
An organization buys merchandise (usually from 3rd world country) and then that merchandise gets shipped to the United States. The organization will send out emails, visit college campuses, and travel to different fair trade stores to sell the merchandise. Then, I drive to the store to purchase it. OR I will get online and order the merchandise and have it shipped directly to my house. (wow I'm lazy) I get my new product and use it. The organization eventually gets my money from a purchase order or through their website. Then the organization takes that money (after cost of the original item) buys more merchandise and then gives it to the people who actually need it. Talk about a middle man.
I don't want to buy things for 'a good cause,' I want to be out in the world and cause good.
God, teach me a life of simplicity. Show me opportunities to truly make a difference.
What if we stopped feeling the need to get something for what we give? What if we just gave without the expectation of even a thank you? As a Christian, my mindset is that what I have is not mine anyway. Why do I feel so entitled? We shouldn't have to have 'fair trade' merchandise, but instead we should trade fairly. Non-profit organizations shouldn't have to sell shoes, t-shirts, or whatever else to meet the needs of people around the world. I should see that need and be compelled to meet it myself.
An organization buys merchandise (usually from 3rd world country) and then that merchandise gets shipped to the United States. The organization will send out emails, visit college campuses, and travel to different fair trade stores to sell the merchandise. Then, I drive to the store to purchase it. OR I will get online and order the merchandise and have it shipped directly to my house. (wow I'm lazy) I get my new product and use it. The organization eventually gets my money from a purchase order or through their website. Then the organization takes that money (after cost of the original item) buys more merchandise and then gives it to the people who actually need it. Talk about a middle man.
I don't want to buy things for 'a good cause,' I want to be out in the world and cause good.
God, teach me a life of simplicity. Show me opportunities to truly make a difference.
May 3, 2012
oh how time flies
I can't believe it's been nearly 2 months since I have made an update. I'm seriously going to have to start doing better at this. Once I start, I really enjoy it. (mental note made)
Two months. I've turned 24. Had an amazing surprise b-day party. Experienced the first Gray family Easter. Wrapped up my third semester of graduate school. Moved into the next phase of life. Started to think about some long term goals. I graduate this time next year. I've been planning the youth trip to OK. Ready to see the things God is going to do while we are there. I preached last Sunday. Everyone keeps telling me that I've missed my calling, and I've been told that for years. I hope I'm making the right life choices. The next few weeks are going to be really busy, and honestly I'm ready for a few weeks of nothing. Can't wait to go and visit my grandmother this summer at the beach! Life is good. Stress is starting to decrease and I'm finding myself at a place of peace. Well, more often than usual.
I have noticed recently, however, that there are a lot of little things that get on my nerves. I've really been trying to work on it. Just to let things go. I think the more I pray for patience, the more God gives me opportunities to be patient. And let me tell you...It's been a struggle.
Last final tonight, and then strawberry picking tomorrow with Jazzie! Oh sweet summertime, welcome!
Two months. I've turned 24. Had an amazing surprise b-day party. Experienced the first Gray family Easter. Wrapped up my third semester of graduate school. Moved into the next phase of life. Started to think about some long term goals. I graduate this time next year. I've been planning the youth trip to OK. Ready to see the things God is going to do while we are there. I preached last Sunday. Everyone keeps telling me that I've missed my calling, and I've been told that for years. I hope I'm making the right life choices. The next few weeks are going to be really busy, and honestly I'm ready for a few weeks of nothing. Can't wait to go and visit my grandmother this summer at the beach! Life is good. Stress is starting to decrease and I'm finding myself at a place of peace. Well, more often than usual.
I have noticed recently, however, that there are a lot of little things that get on my nerves. I've really been trying to work on it. Just to let things go. I think the more I pray for patience, the more God gives me opportunities to be patient. And let me tell you...It's been a struggle.
Last final tonight, and then strawberry picking tomorrow with Jazzie! Oh sweet summertime, welcome!
Mar 7, 2012
Look Who Changed The World
I am in a group counseling class, and part of the class requirement is to participate in a process group. A few weeks ago I shared that I typically find myself in leadership positions. My life has always seemed to follow the same patterns. Maybe it is because I'm pretty blunt about most things. Maybe my need for organization drives me to manage situations. Maybe I'm just a control freak. I don't know. But this got me thinking....
If I am a natural leader, what kind of leader am I?
Recently I came across a list of the top 100 people who changed the world. A LOT of the people on the list, I don't have a clue who they are. (history has never really been my strong point) Here are a few of the names I recognized on that list: Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King Jr, Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, Buddha, Martin Luther, Mother Teresa....and many many more. Through my processing I have learned the type of leader I want to be. I still have some work to do...
1. To communicate clearly, calmly, and effectively.
2. To commit to a sense of enthusiasm that is contagious
3. To value those I lead
4. To remain humble in even the most difficult situations. I will always have something to learn.
5. To not be afraid to get my hands dirty. The most effective leaders will lead by example. (note list above)
6. To commit to the success of everyone involved in any given task
7. To be willing to take risks
8. To be open minded, and able to admit when I'm wrong
9. To be reliable and consistent
10. To be patient. Everyone will not see things the way I do.
11. To be honest
12. To always keep perspective
Let's be honest, this list could go on and on and on. I'm sure I will continue to learn about leadership and about myself along the way. I just want to be the kind of person that people want to follow. I want people to look up to me because of my character and not my status.
If I am a natural leader, what kind of leader am I?
Recently I came across a list of the top 100 people who changed the world. A LOT of the people on the list, I don't have a clue who they are. (history has never really been my strong point) Here are a few of the names I recognized on that list: Jesus Christ, Martin Luther King Jr, Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, Buddha, Martin Luther, Mother Teresa....and many many more. Through my processing I have learned the type of leader I want to be. I still have some work to do...
1. To communicate clearly, calmly, and effectively.
2. To commit to a sense of enthusiasm that is contagious
3. To value those I lead
4. To remain humble in even the most difficult situations. I will always have something to learn.
5. To not be afraid to get my hands dirty. The most effective leaders will lead by example. (note list above)
6. To commit to the success of everyone involved in any given task
7. To be willing to take risks
8. To be open minded, and able to admit when I'm wrong
9. To be reliable and consistent
10. To be patient. Everyone will not see things the way I do.
11. To be honest
12. To always keep perspective
Let's be honest, this list could go on and on and on. I'm sure I will continue to learn about leadership and about myself along the way. I just want to be the kind of person that people want to follow. I want people to look up to me because of my character and not my status.
Mar 6, 2012
The Flowers Are Starting to Bloom :)
Spring time amazes me. I wake up with the sun shining through my window and I am instantly in a good mood. It feels like the season of new life. Everything starts to bloom, the weather is nice, and the season of lent renews my spirit. For me, there is just something about spring time.
Back in October, God convicted me. I was well into my second semester of graduate school. I was working all the time. I feel like all the boyfriend and I ever did was go out to eat. (besides the bar scene, what do people my age do?) I started to feel so gross.
So, I joined the DeSoto Athletic Club (DAC). I had to meet with a personal trainer for an a general assessment. He showed me around the gym, talked about programs they run, and then finally I stepped onto every girls worse enemy....The Scale. I made it pretty clear that I was not interested in losing weight per say, but I was joining to take yoga classes. One of my best friends from college, Roxanne, introduced me to yoga during my undergrad. I fell in love. Afterwards I felt so relaxed and as if I could conquer the world. Though Yoga does not have a foundation in Christianity, its basis is Meditation. I have been teach my youth about spiritual disciplines on Wednesday nights, and the first one we talked about was Mediation. There is something about being still and centering your life around the creator that brings a person into deep relationship with him.
Well after the assessment, this trainer took me back into the office and in so many words told me that I needed to be doing a little more than yoga classes. They were just going to be a quick fix, but a healthy lifestyle would give me a better overall quality of life. I would like to say I wasn't offended, but that would be a lie. I left that day and over the course of the next few weeks, I got into a routine of my Yoga classes.
You know that busy time of the semester? Papers, finals, projects, group work.....it all seems to hit at once. I had become so stressed out, and it wasn't long before I realized how right that trainer was.(And as I think back now, I think God was using him to try to get through to me) Though Yoga is a good tool, it was a quick fix. After a class I would feel great, but I was not taking care of myself. I knew that God was speaking to me through out this time. I kept hearing him whisper. Your body is a temple. Live your life as an example. Take care of yourself. Self care is not selfish, you can not give what you do not have.
So by myself (and if you have ever gone to a gym that is an accomplishment in and of itself), I went to a Zumba class. And it changed my life. I am not sure if a lot of gyms are like this, but the DAC is pretty clicky. Everyone has friend there...except for me. No one is ever mean to me, but I do not have that support system there most people do. But I go anyways. It is my time. And God has used that time to teach me a number of things.
1. NEVER under estimate the things God will use to speak to you
2. Your body is a temple, and that means a lot more than dressing modestly.
3. When you allow yourself to become still before God, His voice becomes so much more clear.
3a. His voice moves you to action, period.
4. Often times business is used as an excuse to not take care of yourself (thanks, biggest loser: no excuses)
5. I have the most supportive boyfriend ever, and he has been a God sent. I have developed some amazing friendships in the past year or so, I'm eternally grateful.
It was not long after my Zumba experience; I joined Weight Watchers. Cardio classes and weight classes were beneficial, but with Weight Watchers I was able to start filling my body with nutrition. Throughout this experience, I have started to feel like a new person. God is using my journey to a healthy life as a tool to renew my spirit. I have started to bloom.
I had been thinking about this a lot lately. So, I wanted to share. As I have noticed the flowers start to bloom these past couple of weeks, it has given me a chance to really process this change of season in my own life. I am truly excited about the things God has in store.
Back in October, God convicted me. I was well into my second semester of graduate school. I was working all the time. I feel like all the boyfriend and I ever did was go out to eat. (besides the bar scene, what do people my age do?) I started to feel so gross.
So, I joined the DeSoto Athletic Club (DAC). I had to meet with a personal trainer for an a general assessment. He showed me around the gym, talked about programs they run, and then finally I stepped onto every girls worse enemy....The Scale. I made it pretty clear that I was not interested in losing weight per say, but I was joining to take yoga classes. One of my best friends from college, Roxanne, introduced me to yoga during my undergrad. I fell in love. Afterwards I felt so relaxed and as if I could conquer the world. Though Yoga does not have a foundation in Christianity, its basis is Meditation. I have been teach my youth about spiritual disciplines on Wednesday nights, and the first one we talked about was Mediation. There is something about being still and centering your life around the creator that brings a person into deep relationship with him.
Well after the assessment, this trainer took me back into the office and in so many words told me that I needed to be doing a little more than yoga classes. They were just going to be a quick fix, but a healthy lifestyle would give me a better overall quality of life. I would like to say I wasn't offended, but that would be a lie. I left that day and over the course of the next few weeks, I got into a routine of my Yoga classes.
You know that busy time of the semester? Papers, finals, projects, group work.....it all seems to hit at once. I had become so stressed out, and it wasn't long before I realized how right that trainer was.(And as I think back now, I think God was using him to try to get through to me) Though Yoga is a good tool, it was a quick fix. After a class I would feel great, but I was not taking care of myself. I knew that God was speaking to me through out this time. I kept hearing him whisper. Your body is a temple. Live your life as an example. Take care of yourself. Self care is not selfish, you can not give what you do not have.
So by myself (and if you have ever gone to a gym that is an accomplishment in and of itself), I went to a Zumba class. And it changed my life. I am not sure if a lot of gyms are like this, but the DAC is pretty clicky. Everyone has friend there...except for me. No one is ever mean to me, but I do not have that support system there most people do. But I go anyways. It is my time. And God has used that time to teach me a number of things.
1. NEVER under estimate the things God will use to speak to you
2. Your body is a temple, and that means a lot more than dressing modestly.
3. When you allow yourself to become still before God, His voice becomes so much more clear.
3a. His voice moves you to action, period.
5. I have the most supportive boyfriend ever, and he has been a God sent. I have developed some amazing friendships in the past year or so, I'm eternally grateful.
It was not long after my Zumba experience; I joined Weight Watchers. Cardio classes and weight classes were beneficial, but with Weight Watchers I was able to start filling my body with nutrition. Throughout this experience, I have started to feel like a new person. God is using my journey to a healthy life as a tool to renew my spirit. I have started to bloom.
I had been thinking about this a lot lately. So, I wanted to share. As I have noticed the flowers start to bloom these past couple of weeks, it has given me a chance to really process this change of season in my own life. I am truly excited about the things God has in store.
Feb 23, 2012
I often meet people who aren’t part of a church and don’t
want anything to do with God because of “all those religious hypocrites.” Often
they have great pain that they blame on ‘the church.’ But it’s not possible for
an institution, whether it’s a church or a school or a business or even the
government, to hurt somebody.
Institutions are made up of people.
People hurt people.
--Rob Bell
Jan 29, 2012
what we say
It has been brought to my attention lately how much words really do hurt. And I know what you are thinking..."Oh no not again. I've heard this since grade school. Please don't go on a rant." But if you keep reading, you might be wrong. This is something so personal to so many people.
I've been learning in classes, that some theorist believe we are a product of our environment. Though I believe other factors play a part in who we become, our environment does impact us greatly.We can only become what we know, and for most people all they know is what they have been around. So maybe before you start to judge someone according to your standards, you should take a step back and look and why they may be different.
There is something beautiful about the differences in people. Think about that. I do not believe there are 'better' people, only different people. Maybe sometimes the roles people play in life do not get them what they want, but also maybe those people don't know how to change it either.
I feel like we all have that story. The story where someone said something negative about us and it stuck with us. Someone laughed at us, talked about us, made fun of us, picked on us....the list goes on. Things stick with us. But it is not only what we say that hurts people. It is what we do. I am the worse about my face giving away exactly what I am thinking, and I don't even have to say a word. A lot of times you can tell a friend is mad at you just because of how they are acting, and they don't even really have to say anything. We have to be so aware of ourselves, or we will hurt people without even realizing it. What we say is not simply words, but it is what we do.
I've been learning in classes, that some theorist believe we are a product of our environment. Though I believe other factors play a part in who we become, our environment does impact us greatly.We can only become what we know, and for most people all they know is what they have been around. So maybe before you start to judge someone according to your standards, you should take a step back and look and why they may be different.
There is something beautiful about the differences in people. Think about that. I do not believe there are 'better' people, only different people. Maybe sometimes the roles people play in life do not get them what they want, but also maybe those people don't know how to change it either.
I feel like we all have that story. The story where someone said something negative about us and it stuck with us. Someone laughed at us, talked about us, made fun of us, picked on us....the list goes on. Things stick with us. But it is not only what we say that hurts people. It is what we do. I am the worse about my face giving away exactly what I am thinking, and I don't even have to say a word. A lot of times you can tell a friend is mad at you just because of how they are acting, and they don't even really have to say anything. We have to be so aware of ourselves, or we will hurt people without even realizing it. What we say is not simply words, but it is what we do.
Jan 18, 2012
This time of year always seems to take a toll on me. I don't know if it is the cold weather or the lack of sunshine, but I always seem to be a Debbie Downer. Or as my friend Jazzie would say a Negative Nancy. I think it is part of my genes or something. I can't help it.
There is just so much I'd like to change. I'm SO ready for the next thing. I'm already way over this whole school thing. And it stresses me out to think about our comprehensive exams and practicum and internship. I just feel like I have so much to do in a little amount of time. I'm ready for that little amount of time...which feels like years...to hurry along.
I want to move somewhere new with the love of my life. I want to start fresh with my own place and a new job in a new city/town to explore. I love that feeling of starting over. I like the struggle of meeting new people and finding a new church. I like that feeling of adventure.
I love my program, and my course of study. But the more I learn about counseling the less I want to do a sit down formal counseling job. I want to be out in the community advocating. I want to work with at risk teenagers and their families. I'm taking a group class this semester and I have a feeling I'm really going to like it. The group setting is what I love the most. That feeling of community and doing it together.
Okay, I'm done rambling and venting now.
God, help me to get excited about this life I'm living right now and not focus on the life I want in the future. Amen.
There is just so much I'd like to change. I'm SO ready for the next thing. I'm already way over this whole school thing. And it stresses me out to think about our comprehensive exams and practicum and internship. I just feel like I have so much to do in a little amount of time. I'm ready for that little amount of time...which feels like years...to hurry along.
I want to move somewhere new with the love of my life. I want to start fresh with my own place and a new job in a new city/town to explore. I love that feeling of starting over. I like the struggle of meeting new people and finding a new church. I like that feeling of adventure.
I love my program, and my course of study. But the more I learn about counseling the less I want to do a sit down formal counseling job. I want to be out in the community advocating. I want to work with at risk teenagers and their families. I'm taking a group class this semester and I have a feeling I'm really going to like it. The group setting is what I love the most. That feeling of community and doing it together.
Okay, I'm done rambling and venting now.
God, help me to get excited about this life I'm living right now and not focus on the life I want in the future. Amen.
Jan 3, 2012
it's a new year
When I think about this past year, it absolutely amazes me. Sometimes things happen so fast, yet slow at the same time. The valleys always make the mountain top that much better. It is hard to think back and remember all the things that God brought me through in 2011. So much has happened. I found love. I found friendships. I've been blessed with an amazing job. My family and I are transitioning into a mature relationship. School is going by so quick, and I'm starting to see some of my calling. I'm realizing how deep my hunger is for adventure, and how extremely hard it is for me to settle down...anywhere.
This year my life song has had times of shouted heartbreak and times of rejoiced hallelujahs. Notes have turned into melodies and I'm starting to see life before me. God always seems to find the broken pieces and place them back together in some fashion or another. And it always seems to be better than I could have ever imagined.
Thank you God for a new year, but also thank you for this past year. I am truly grateful. Love.
This year my life song has had times of shouted heartbreak and times of rejoiced hallelujahs. Notes have turned into melodies and I'm starting to see life before me. God always seems to find the broken pieces and place them back together in some fashion or another. And it always seems to be better than I could have ever imagined.
Thank you God for a new year, but also thank you for this past year. I am truly grateful. Love.
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