Holy Week

Palm Sunday:

Matthew 21:8-11
"A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, while others cut branches from trees and spread them on the road. The crowds that went ahead of him and those that followed shouted. "Hosanna to the Son of David!" "Blessed is he who comes in the name of the lord!" "Hosanna in the highest heaven!" When Jesus entered Jerusalem, the whole city was stirred and asked, "Who is this?" The Crowds answered, "This is Jesus, the prophet of Nazareth in Galilee."

I just love Easter. We have now entered Holy Week, and I want to make sure I take the time to really reflect on how greatly I've been blessed. It amazes me everytime I think about the things Jesus went through this week. He comes into Jersualem treated like a King, and then a week later the same people who shouted "Hosanna!" are shouting "Crucify Him!" I realize the power of persuasion, maybe being on a Speech and Debate team in college taught me that, but how could a joyous crowd swich so quickly to an angry mob? I often wonder what side would I have been on if I lived back then. It scares me. Disiples who saw him feed 5,000 with a few fish and a few loaves, saw him heal lame and blind, and embrace sinners....denied him. How strong is my faith really?

God, during this time in Holy Week remind me how great you are. Help me to see the sacrifices you made for me then, and the sacrifices you make for me everday now. Surround me with yourself. Consume me. I love you. And I praise you. Amen.

Transformed

So, I don't blog near as much as I thought I would when I started...

I have been thinking a lot lately about the idea of transformation. I have always believed that once you become a Christian, life is a transformation process. I believe that is basically what the Bible teaches. Here on Earth we are continually being transformed into the likeness of God. I often find myself praying for God to transform my heart--my life.

I think this idea of transformation could transcend to other aspects of my life. For example, my thoughts. How I feel about myself or someone else would transform over time. Basically, I think I'm saying this whole thing is a process. And it is a process that is not easy for me. Transformation does not always go in a positive direction. Once I realize I've been on the wrong track, I have to start again. Not go backwards, that's impossible. But open myself again. Allow myself to enter the transformation process. I have been blessed with a man who tells me everyday that I'm beautiful. His words are part of my process. The words I say are part of someone else's process. We really do impact the people around us. We are not only being transformed, but transforming others.

God, help me to be a light in the darkness.

Where does time go?

It has been a while since I have posted anything. I can't believe how fast time has flown by! Nothing too exciting has happened. Spring break as come and gone. Now I'm just waiting for the summer! It is so hard to believe that I am almost done with my first semester of graduate school! 2011...before I know it will be 2012.

God has really blessed me with an amazing second family :) I have met some awesome friends at school, and I have been able to rebuild old friendships. God is good. Life is good.

Last Sunday at church my pastor said something that I have been thinking about lately. I have always tried to be optimistic. My boyfriend said just yesterday that I smile all the time, lol. Now, I don't think that is true but I do try to see the glass as half full. It gets on people's nerves sometimes. But Bro. Jim was talking about God and the things he wants to bless us with...the things he has already blessed us with. I'm not really talking about material things, though that is not out of reach. I'm mostly talking about things of the spirit. God desires to give us an uncontainable joy. He wants to bless us with true friends, and love, and hope, and peace.... God doesn't want our cup to be half empty, or even half full. God wants our cup to overflow! How encouraging that we serve a God like that!

God, help me to remember how great you truly are.

shalom.

The Simple Life

I just want to live simply. I want my priorities to be straight. I feel like the whole world around me is in a constant state of chaos. Everyone worries about things that don't really matter. Do you realize how big God is? I mean come on now. It seems like people will do whatever they have to in order to get to the top....the top of what? I'm not sure exactly. The top of society I guess. But who really wants to be there? And I've never really seen anyone stay for very long. I think the higher you go, the harder you'll fall. And I don't know about you, but I don't really take pain well.

let. me. live. simply.
please.

Epiphany

I am starting to learn a lot about myself. I know that the college experience radically changed my life. I had an amazing group of friends. The classes I took challenged me to the very core of who I was. Now that I'm going on a year out of my undergrad and living back home. I'm staring to realize how much those experiences really changed my whole outlook on life. I was talking to a friend the other day and said, I use to not be like this. And that is true. I wasn't always this passive. There was a time I wanted the greater things in life. I use to put myself above others. I use to want to strive hard and be the best, not for myself, but for those around me. I couldn't fall, everyone was watching. And though I was never perfect, I always acted like I was. I think over time, I gave up. I gave up living for everyone else and started living for myself. I gave up striving for things that won't last, and realized that everything I have was given to me anyway. I don't have to be the best; I just have to do my best. The simplicity of life has overwhelmed me. I just want to love God and love people.

Now, I'm still far from perfect. I struggle everyday. And I think this whole self realization thing might be part of the process of life. I have been in Graduate School a total of 3 weeks and can already feel myself changing. I am already being challenged. For some reason, I am more aware of it now. Maybe that is just part of getting older. I don't know. But I've never really been afraid of change.

God, thank you for molding me and shaping me into the person you would have me be. continue to transform me. help me to stay focused on the things that really matter. Amen.

List of Things I Learned Today:

1. My 4 year old sister is smarter than me.
2. The unknown is really exciting....and really scary.
3. I am powerless. (Gah, that's hard to say. Thanks anonymous programs.)
4. Everything is a system, and a learning experience.
5. Epistemology

...this is a tentative list.

today's prayer

Hey dad, I just wanted to take the time to say thank you. I think too often in this life I get so caught up in the details that I miss the big picture. You are good, and you want what's best for me. Thank you for the places you're taking me and the people you have brought into my life. I am being broken, molded, and shaped in the person you want me to be. I don't have to have all the answers. I don't have to be in control all the time. Help me to open my eyes to see the blessings you have placed right in front of me. Take my hand and lead me in the direction you would have me go. I'm sorry for making things harder than they should be. I'm sorry for the times I doubt your love for me. I'm sorry for the lack of brokenness and openness here lately. I think today I realized that happiness is something that I  can choose for myself every day, but true joy can only come from you.  I want you to be my joy and my strength. I love you, and I thank you. Amen.